All-Star Break Begins, Trades Start Pouring In
Deadline to Make Trades Set for 12:05 pm EST, Thursday, July 11, 2002
SANTA LECHUGA (SLPL News) - The official All-Star Break for the SLPL began Sunday night. The Mid-Season Trade deadline is 12:05 pm EST, Thursday, July 11, 2002. While the town of Santa Lechuga is preparing for SLPL All-Star festivities to be held at Stalker's Stadium, home of the Santa Lechuga Bus Wreck, SLPL owners have already begun ditchin' dogs, securing stars, and lamenting player agents.
Amidst great controversy, SLPL Commissioner Rube Furrow Sunday night decided to hold the All-Star game in Santa Lechuga on Tuesday night, despite several owners voting to hold the game in Mexico. "I wasn't sure how to make the decision," Rube said. "But then I thought about how my hero Bud Selig is holding the MLB All-Star game in Milwaukee and decided to take his lead. I mean, who cares about the health of baseball when revenue is at stake?"
SLPL owners, meanwhile, are busy making the all-important Mid-Season Trades to get rid of low-performers and secure baseball's best players. And though these trades are only ten-dollars apiece, some owners are still having problems. Said Beat Some Ash owner Jack M. Outt, "I will be declaring the midseason trade(s) in the near future. I'm still in the middle of negotiating contracts.... damn those agents!!"