May 12, 2002

La División Violeta Kicking Serious Hiney

If you're not in La División Violeta, you gotta be feeling thankful. The Strokes owner Aaron Pankoke was recently overheard lamenting the fact that even though he was in third place overall, he was only in third place in his division. And despite the fact that Jeff Brown's Magic Johnson's would be leading three other divisions in the SLPL, he's only in fourth place in the La División Violeta. Meanwhile, James Gallagher's The Dudes and Jeren Livernois' P-Town Players, continue to anchor the top of the standings along with Pankoke's The Strokes and Matt Martin's Las Tepetas (from La División Verde).

La División Gris May be Toughest Division

With no team having fewer than 644 points, the La División Gris may be the toughest division in the league. For games through May 11th, there are just 165 points separating the division's last place team -- Vern Fisher's Taliban Rangers -- from the first place team -- Dave Jannusch's Beat Some Ash. Overall, La División Gris has compiled 6,109 points. Pedregoso says to watch out for Kelsey Brewer's Rent-a-Team, a dark horse in the making.

It's Up for Grabs in La División Rojo

With three leaders in the last seven days, the La División Rojo appears to be totally up for grabs. Since games through May 5th, James Woo's Las Vegas Losers, Sue Klinkhamer's Dago T's, and Lucy Juarez's Pancho's Sandalias have each led the division. All three owners should be thankful to be in that division since there no teams from La División Rojo in the top ten of the overall standings.

The Brothers Martin Lead Respective Divisions

Cabbage Farmers owner Paul Martin and Las Tepetas owner Matt Martin are leading their respective divisions. Their almost identical rosters have SLPL investigators looking into possible collusion between the brothers.

There's No Truth to the Rumor That ...

There's no truth to the rumor that KO Kid owner Ken Ottmar is kicking himself for having already made both of his DL trades. He probably should be, though, considering that he's in fourth place in the La División Anaranjada and in 28th place overall.

There's no truth to the rumor that Fort Ord Fiends owner Brian Styers is gloating about the fact that he's leading the Monterey Herald Division standings. He probably should be, though, considering that he's a newcomer in the midst of old veterans and is leading the Natural Division that was the genesis of the Santa Lechuga Power League.

There's no truth to the rumor that Cardwheels owner Sue Kaschalk, Scratch-N-Spit Naturals owner James R. Hicks, and Pepino Monos owner Pedregoso Ríos are doing touchdown dances now that Mike Hampton has finally hit a home run, giving those owners 20 bonus points. They probably should be, though, considering that they made the boneheaded move of putting Hampton on their pitching staffs in the first place.

©2002 Tony Livernois and Joe Livernois. All rights reserved.

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By Pedregoso Rios, Majority Owner, Pepino Monos